April Dew

…bedewing a withered thought


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Does platonic friendship really exist between a man and a woman?

Recently, I found an article that talks about platonic friendship. Can men and women become really close friends without any sensual desire? Based on my experience with my guy best friend, my answer is a big YES! But, as viewed by men, this article says ‘NO’. It seems that according to a study conducted by a Japanese bridal site Bridal Souken and was translated by rocketnews24.com, many more men and women think it is than isn’t and gender is but a single piece of a bigger puzzle.

I honestly found the idea of doing a scientific study on platonic friendship humorous at first but later realized it’s interesting, and perhaps has raised serious debates. I’m going to share my personal point-of-view on this matter by telling you a story.

Whenever I hear the phrase ‘platonic friendship’, I can’t help but reminisce the memories I had with my very close friend, Jemar whom I called my “guy bestfriend.” He died at the age of 21 in a motorcycle accident.

We were yet but strangers on our first few days in high school since we both studied in different schools during our elementary years. We became acquainted when one of my very close girl friends had a crush on him and I eventually became the bridge of the two. Since I had to talk to him about some things between him and my girl friend, we usually spent most of each school day together. He’s an eldest child among two siblings and guess needed a sister-like figure that’s why he liked hanging out with me. When we reached sophomore, I gradually considered him as my best friend and he considered me the same. He called me “ate” a Cebuano salutation for ‘big sister’ while I called him “dodong” a local vocative for ‘younger brother.’ On our second year of friendship, I became and acted like her real sister, telling him what to do or not to do (especially when he started wooing my girl friend). People who didn’t know us very well would ask if we had a special relationship or what because what we had wasn’t typical to them. We hugged whenever we saw each other, and he’d place his arms on my shoulders while we were walking down the street or even held my hands. We even slept on the same bed one time when we were both so busy at school and became exhausted. It was literally ‘sleeping together.’ Indeed, the platonic feeling was mutual.

We became so accustomed to treating each other in a sweet but unromantic way. Though some of his guy friends would tease us and thought we’re into something, we really didn’t mind them…at all! As for me, it was indeed nothing even until we graduated high school. When we both stepped into college and needed to part ways, that changed a bit. We had each of our own partners. There was some kind of awkward feeling whenever he hugged me. He never changed but I did. He even hugged me in front of her girlfriend but never would I hug him in front of my boy friend.

What made me change when I had a boyfriend? I guess the reasons were obvious. One, I didn’t want each of our partners to feel jealous. Two, I realized, we were no longer youngsters and both worlds have changed. Or, was I the only one noticing the difference? It’s just so unfortunate that upon writing this article, I couldn’t get the answer to my question. I asked a few of my male students if they experienced the kind of friendship we had. Unluckily, only one out of twelve Japanese male students had it. His answers to my questions were totally the opposite of what I expected although I know his answers were more realistic than mine. He said, he kept his feelings toward his girl best friend for years. He was just too afraid to break their friendship since the girl told him beforehand this painful line, “You’re just a brother to me.” That line was a slap on his face though it was unsolicited. He thinks that what the girl made her say that, is perhaps he was showing signs of his true feelings.

My intent of citing real-life stories is to show that a man and a woman can really be true friends free from physical interests but not in all cases.

Is a friendship between a man and a woman real? Yes. In fact, we all build platonic friendship daily. Females interact and build friendship with males at work, at school, at our neighborhood, etc. However, physiologically and psychologically, we are born with innate or natural impulses commonly known as human instincts including reproduction and pair bonding which I think are barriers. Therefore, it’s not impossible for a man and a woman who consider themselves as ‘just friends’ progress to non-platonic relationship like boyfriend/ girlfriend or the kind of intimate friendship shown in the movies ‘No Strings Attached’ or ‘Friends with Benefits’ solely because we’re human beings capable of feeling some sensual urge. Nevertheless, breaking the barriers I mentioned earlier may annihilate a good friendship. A platonic friendship therefore is possible, but has a critical point of termination.

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Words To Know: Seven Most Horriyfing Words for Halloween

Here are the seven spine-chilling words in English.

Perdition

[per-dish-uh n]

In Christian mythology, “perdition” is the state of final spiritual ruin where the wicked are condemned to eternal damnation. In other words, it’s a way scarier word for hell. The term is derived from the Latin perdere meaning “to lose” or “to ruin.” So hold onto your souls, our next word might scare you right out of your skin.

Nyctophobia

[nik-tuh-foh-bee-uh]

Are you afraid of the dark? If the answer is yes, you might have nyctophobia, the abnormal fear of night or darkness. Derived from the Greek nux for “night” and phobia meaning “an aversion,” nyctophobia is the perfect word for anyone who hides under the covers once the lights go out. If you’d rather sleep in a coffin than a bed, you’ll feel nice and cozy with our next word.

Sepulchral

[suh-puhl-kruh l]

Is anything of or pertaining to burial. Derived from the Latin sepulcralis meaning “to bury in the earth” the term owes its root to the word ‘sepulcher,’ a tomb or crypt for the dead. But unlike a sepulcher itself, many things can be sepulchral: the deep and hollow tone of a bell, a cold draft of wind that stands your hair on end, even the vacant eyes of the undead. If you’ve ever heard of Dr. Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde, then you’ve seen our next term in action.

Berserk

[ber-surk, -zurk]

When someone goes ‘berserk,’ they become crazy, deranged, overtaken by a violent destructive frenzy. From chainsaw-wielding killers to bloodthirsty zombies, berserk is the perfect term to describe the villains of most scary movies. The term originates from Old Norse, a language that evolved from ancient Viking tongues, with bjorn meaning “bear” and serkr  meaning “shirt” or “armor.” With this etymology in mind, when someone goes berserk, it’s as though they’ve covered up their rational human behavior with the wild aspect of a bear.

Thanatopsis

[than-uh-top-sis]

Do you spend a lot of time in graveyards? Did most of your friends die before you were born? If so, then you might be poised to write a fantastic thanatopsis. From the Greek thantos meaning “death” and -opsis meaning “a view,” a thanatopsis is a written contemplation of death, often in the form of a poem. The 17th century poet William Cullen Bryant first popularized the style with a poem called-you guessed it-Thanatopsis.

Trepidation

[trep-i-dey-shuh n]

When a visit from a ghost sends shivers down your spine, or when a run in with a vampire gives you goose bumps, what are you feeling? Trepidation, of course. Trepidation is an experience of fear or alarm that often results in trembling or quivering. The word is derived from two Latin stems trepidare meaning “to tremble, hurry” and trepidus meaning “alarmed” or “scared.” If you plan on feeling trepidation this Halloween, our next word might give you a reason.

Lycanthrope

[lahy-kuh n-throhp, lahy-kan-throhp]

We’ve all heard the word werewolf, but the wolf community much prefers the term “lycanthrope.” Derived from the Greek lykanthropos  meaning “wolf-man,” our dictionary defines lycanthrope as “a werewolf or alien spirit in the physical form of a bloodthirsty wolf.” Though the word is used primarily in the occult, there is an actual psychiatric condition called lycanthropy, in which a person believes that he or she is a wolf.

Learn more bizarre words from my most favorite dictionary online: Dictionary.com


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Russia’s Real Barbie Girl Meets Ukraine’s Anime Girl

Most little girls adore dolls and grow up playing with them. Some of us (ladies) may want to look like them. I was one of those young women who kept on daydreaming that fairies were real and would grant me a wish- to look like Barbie! But, after seeing these photos, my idea of pulchritude was utterly distorted. I’d never wanted to have the same aesthetic choice…ever! However, this is just my opinion after knowing the dolls above are indeed REAL HUMAN BEINGS!

Valeria Lukyanova (right), who calls herself Real Barbie is an internet sensation in her home country of Russia and Anastasiya Shpagina (left), is Ukraine’s Anime Girl. They both meet to do a photoshoot for the first time together.

21-year old Valeria shocked the world of her doll-like features, long blonde hair and ‘perfect’ body which is rumored to be a product of extensive plastic surgery. On the other hand, 19-year old Anastasya who looks like an anime that just stepped out of the manga comic and transforms herself into a warm-blooded anime girl achieves her appearance due to extreme make-up job. According to kyivpost, it takes her 3 hours every day to complete her wild look. As you have noticed, they focus on their  eyes making them enormous and making their noses and lips smaller.

Just imagine seeing them personally and eventually talk to you! Ah, just the thought of seeing their eyes with my own naked eyes  scares me. Perhaps, you have your own perception, but that’s just the way I see it, OK? lol!

What I appreciate about these girls is that, they’re very brave to be what they wanted to be. I mean, it’s not easy to be like this. I’m sure they went under the knife and had to endure a lot of pain just to bring this  about. You may think they’re crazy or what. But, as for me, that’s just the way they are. It’s really hard to judge because we don’t know them personally.

I know most of us have tried sacrificing some things to get something.  Since they’ve gone this far to look good, I just hope they’ve finally acquired the contentment and happiness. That matters, right?


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Back to Halloween Theme

Hi! A few days have passed without posting back about Halloween must-haves and must-DIY’s.  I’m so sorry for my silence. I know I promised to write a series of Halloween posts for a week. I’m a bit pressed for time at the moment but luckily found a spare for today – an hour or so. Do you mind if I carry this on now? Oh, Thank you! (Talking to myself..scary! lol)

I was using the most powerful tool to make this post easier for me – the internet! I spotted a few much-easier-than-a-pie snacks which can also be a spook-tacular Halloween decor. Enjoy staring!!! Hahaha. Don’t limit yourself for just a look or read. I wish you’d  eventually do these projects too!

Have fun with mallows

These are apparently one of the easiest. What you need: mallows as heads, sticks as tiny bodies  and edible markers to make them faces. Thanks to decorated cookie and mom me for the inspiration.

Goodies in a bowl

If mallows are the easiest, this seems to be the easiestest?!! Oh, no students! There’s no such word as “easiestest” in the dictionary, ‘ayt? That’s just my way of telling you that these are all simple things to make. I guess it’s for you to decide which you think is the most effortless for you to do. As for me, these are the quickest. What you need: glass bowls, candies and/or cheese balls or any edible that’s more or less fitting to the theme. You may also add a creepy spider on top.  To aid you create an embellished bowl similar to the first photo, you can click here.

Cup-spooky treats

Look at these amazingly pretty sweets in a glass cup treats! Gazing at them reminds me  of the cliché “simplicity is beauty.”  It’s because I found them so eerily cute  (if I were to coin a term for it) and making them is without a fuss! What you need: glass cups, crushed chocolate cookies (Oreos!), cookies (as gravestones), gummy worms, jello gelatin. Kindly check this out for steps on how to make the worm jello . You may replace gummy worms with cookies as gravestones like that of the second photo or put gummy worms and cookie gravestones in the same glass for a more uncanny appeal.

So, don’t ever think this is too early to prepare for your Halloween party! Hello, it’s mid October! Of course, you don’t want to race against time. I hope I have lent you a hand with this post. Keep posted!


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It’s Halloween! What to wear?

It’s officially October! That means, Halloween! I suppose a lot of us are already thinking of some ideas for a Halloween party. I guess, that includes me (pretty much) .  So, I want to take part of giving you some inspiration for a spooky-fun party. I know the internet is brimming with ideas.  This week, I’ll be posting things that you need to prepare for the Halloween. Today, let’s start with costumes.

WHAT-TO-WEAR INSPIRATION

For girls…

I found this kid costume  so cute that I want to share it to my students who are patiently opening my newly-born blog.  For my little girl students, please ask help from your moms. For my mommy students, please please try to help your girls. Lol!

Here’s a step-by-step tutorial to do this amazingly cute skirt and see how easy it’s being done. You don’t even need a needle to do this.

Now that you know how to make a tutu, then you might want to make another one for your toddler and wear it this way:

Isn’t it  cute??!!!

For ladies…

Although we wanted to be as scary as possible to win the best in costume, most of the ladies don’t want to sacrifice their chic looks (and that includes me again!). You can be a pretty owl for the night.

So, why not choose a stylish costume that would still fit that night of both fun and creepy moments?! Click the link to know how to do it yourself.

NAIL ART INSPIRATION

If you think you’re all set after making your own costume, you’re wrong. Complete the package with perfectly eerie but pretty nails. Have some spooky cookie nails!

Get your own nails done! My favorite is the first nail art photo. I just like the color combination and the spider web. It’s also done very neatly.  You can also check out how the second nail art is done by blingernails.

ACCESSORIES

If you’re just not into costume and wants to stay simple as you are, you can grab your little black dress and wear some accessories you can just do-it-yourself! Here’s a headband that looks pretty awesome with just a plain dress.

There you have it! Easy and simple steps to dress yourselves up for a spook-tacular Halloween affair! Have fun girls and ladies!